Time Alone: a Fundamental Need
Although time alone is a fundamental need, during the 20th century and so far in the 21st, we have witnessed an increase in the value placed on social relationships. Although these contribute to our well-being, the perception of their absence is, in many cases, a source of fear and anguish.
There are several meditation practices that include spending time alone. In some of them, one of the tasks is to spend a few days completely in solitude and absolute silence, with hardly any contact with the outside world. Do you feel capable of doing this?
Perhaps most people would struggle: we are not used to such a low level of stimulation. Isolated and not experience any contact for a while is a test of fire. Training is required to do this. However, if this is a regular exercise among those who meditate, it is precisely because it brings enormous benefits. Solitude, well managed, empowers.
The company sometimes overwhelms
Social relationships demand a lot of us, especially when they are very wide and narrow. Also, of course, they generate a lot of satisfactions. However, just without you realizing it, it is also something that you invest a lot of your time and a lot of your energy.
We very easily end up living in function of others. Work, partner, family, friends … There are many social areas in which we move and each one of them has its demands and tensions. Many times a point is reached where we cannot distinguish well where our own ends and where the collective begins. Or vice versa.
Spending time alone is a way to refocus our attention and energy on ourselves. An opportunity to be “selfish” without feeling guilty about it. These spaces help us to meet again. To perceive how we really are without the influence of that habitual context.
Time alone sensitizes
Somehow, loneliness also imposes silence. There is a shift of attention from outside to inside. When you stop using the part of the brain that is responsible for speech, other areas of that organ begin to act with greater intensity.
In particular, there is evidence that attention and concentration are sharpened. In solitude, thought sharpens, wit sharpens. At first the thoughts can be scattered, but the normal thing is that later they acquire a definite form.
If you spend time alone for several days, the effect is that little by little you become sensitized. This means that you begin to notice ideas and feelings that you may not have been aware of. This is a way to wake up, to connect more in the dialogue that you have with yourself.
There are effects on the brain
There are studies in which it is indicated that loneliness and silence benefit the folds of the cerebral cortex. This apparently causes the gray matter in the brain to thicken. The result of this is that you become more adept at processing information.
This has a favorable impact on your cognitive processes. When you return to your normal life, you find that you learn and memorize more easily. You get the most out of any intellectual activity, becoming more productive.
Likewise, it is very likely that in those moments of loneliness what they call “Eureka moments” appear, that is, sudden inspirations. In other words, those conditions facilitate the emergence of creativity.
To consider…
Ideally, we can have at least 10 minutes a day to have alone time. This does not mean being left alone and locked in without more, but in a time and space available to be with ourselves. If not possible every day, at least three times a week.
Now, in those stages in which we feel very “loaded” or overwhelmed, it may be necessary to do a more intense exercise. It is advisable to take a trip alone. It does not have to be on the other side of the world, but it does have to be in a space that really allows a cut with the usual.
Be prepared to feel some discomfort, especially if you haven’t done it before. All change implies a certain resistance. However, if you follow their inertia -without a purpose beyond being with yourself-, you will realize that it is a worthwhile experience.
