Things Not To Break: Trust, Promises And Hearts

There are three things you shouldn’t break: trust, a promise, and a heart. If we think about it, few dimensions are so valuable in life. Thanks to them, we managed to advance through our future with more ease and security by feeling part of a project, part of someone. They are those pillars that, in case of collapse, leave us more vulnerable than ever …

Something that social psychologists and even sociologists often comment is that today, many people interact with others under what is known as the risk mitigation model. That is to say, there are those who avoid going too deep into their personal and affective relationships in order not to be hurt, to experience disappointments, frustrations and the occasional disappointment.

That “saving” of emotional energy, that affective containment fosters bonds of poor human quality, recyclable relationships that come and go or that remain in a frivolous superficial layer. With this, of course, the risk of being injured at some point is mitigated by building the most innocuous ties with the flavor of a substitute for happiness. However, is it really worth living in that icy anteroom where nothing authentic germinates or happens?

One aspect that we cannot lose sight of is the fact that each of us is genetically “programmed” to trust others. It is something we need, and we need it with all our might because in a way our survival has always depended on each of those individuals who make up our closest social group.

Nobody wins if they live constantly distrusting others. It is earned by deploying resources, energy and intentions, being emotionally courageous, mobilizing openness, a positive attitude and being clear that there are three aspects that should not be violated or broken: trust, promises and hearts.

Things you should not break, things that are worth much more than money

Repairing lost confidence is one of the most complex, delicate, and challenging endeavors that human beings can go through. As children they teach us, most of us, that there are certain things that we should not break because they cost money, because they are many years old and are irreplaceable or simply, because what breaks, fragments or breaks in half can no longer be used. .

They rarely let us know that there are other things that, despite not being able to be seen or touched, break more often. What’s more, there are invisible dimensions that are fragmented like the bones of our body and that, curiously, take much longer to heal. We speak of the trust, promises, respect and affection that is inscribed in the hearts of the people we appreciate.

Sometimes, the infantile gaze learns early to neglect these valuable gifts because their own parents neglect them with them. Because feeding children promises that are not kept later leaves a mark . Because growing up without ever having a real trust from your parents leaves a permanent dent. Likewise, that it is ours who break our hearts in the most elementary ways, such as lack of attention, outlines our behavioral and relational style in most cases.

Those things that you should not break allow you to invest in your own well-being

Today there are many aspects of our brain that we still do not understand. One of them is the variability that exists when dealing with trauma. There are those who develop a state of permanent helplessness, a kind of chronic stress where strong and happy bonds with other people are rarely managed. Others, on the other hand, apply an attitude towards life that places them at that level of humanity, of emotional excellence, from which we should all learn.

There are those who in the past saw themselves lost adrift in the company of its broken pieces. To this day, and  even being fragmented, he knows that only those who offer the most courageous trust to others are worthy of trust. They are those people who never forget their promises, who keep them in the face of winds and tides because they know well how betrayals hurt.

Those resilient and luminous personalities are also the ones who understand how precious a heart is. But they also do not forget how fragile it is sometimes, how fearful it is when the affections are not firm, when it is fed with lies, with doubts, with manipulations and camouflaged betrayals.

Those things that you should not break are therefore the same things that will allow you to have a life with greater meaning and dignity. Because whoever gives deserves to receive, because whoever speaks the language of trust, understands the meaning of promises and knows how to listen to the sound of the hearts of others without damaging them. Thus, he is deserving of the same rights, the same gifts. Those that contribute to the construction of a more respectful and above all, happy reality.