The Ego Distorts Reality
The ego continually needs to give a good image to society, it lacks humility and very often falls into the exercise of pride. Now, it is also convenient to differentiate it from that sense of the more defensive “I”, a psychic instance where one recognizes and defines one’s own identity. Therefore, letting our ego sharpen its most negative side can undoubtedly be a problem.
The ego according to different authors
Few concepts are as complex to define as the ego . Inmanuel Kant understood this dimension as an entity where each mental representation that the person carries out was included. For Sartre it was just another part of consciousness. However, the most interesting and well-known definition is the one provided by psychoanalysis.
For Sigmund Freud the ego is the representation of reality and reason. He is the one who controls the drives of the “it”, and who tries in some way to satisfy the desires of the latter in a socially appropriate way. Now, it must be said that the most popular vision and perhaps associated with that somewhat more negative and complex aspect of the ego, is provided by mystical and oriental philosophies such as Buddhism.
According to these perspectives, the ego is the source of suffering. As Eckhart Tolle explains , we often live excessively attached to our thoughts, our needs, and the codes inherited from our family and society, shaping a false and aligned dimension such as the ego.
In the latter case, this concept is like an illusion, a fantasy that tries to place itself above the others. When we are dominated by our ego, the opinion that one has of oneself is distorted, the true “me” moves away and knowing oneself becomes complicated.
What happens if you allow yourself to be dominated by the ego?
People who live dominated by the ego are deluded, believe they are superior and do not see reality. It is an error of thought that you try to make a presentation of how you would like to be, instead of how you really are.
The ego is also a social mask, a role that distances us more and more from who we really are. This mask needs praise, approval from others, it needs to be in control of situations and people, it wants to have power because deep within its being there is fear.
It is like a character that is being created. The ego moves away from simplicity and is characterized by complication, it is like a performance of the ideal, a false self-esteem that needs to be projected so that no one sees the great insecurity that lurks inside.
Effects of living attached to the ego
Focusing an existence rooted in the ego will cause us to lack initiatives for fear of failure. This dimension places us in a comfortable and routine zone where we can feed the false “me” with praise and acceptance. The known terrain will be your life habit, a place where you are accepted.
You don’t want to risk the unknown for fear of being rejected or criticized. A person who has a true self-esteem is not afraid to explore the unknown because the disapprovals of others accept them and do not bother him. Take the opportunity to learn from what goes wrong, without damaging your personal worth.
What if the ego is not fed?
When the ego is not fed from the outside, the person feels bad. Emotions can experience all kinds of negative sensations, such as shyness, anger, grief, fear, etc …
There we will see that it is a false security in disguise. When the person receives criticism, he is not accepted and he is not recognized, that is when the mask falls off and we can realize that we are not really who we think we are.
According to the ego, your identity depends on what others think of you. That is why it is so important not to let it dominate your life, because otherwise you will be like a leaf that moves with the wind based on what you receive from society.
How to know if the ego dominates you?
To know if you are being dominated by the ego, it is important to undergo a self-analysis. To some extent, the ego is essential for our psychic balance, but when it limits us excessively it can pose a problem for our health and psychological well-being. You can identify if the ego distorts your reality through the following actions.
- You don’t step out of your comfort zone. In general, you are a person who risks little because of the fear of failure and the unknown. So you fill yourself with excuses not to change something in your life.
- You have a false self-esteem. It implies that you see yourself saying positive things about yourself that you don’t really believe. You need to convince others of your abilities, resources, and accomplishments and ask others to return those perceptions to you. Thus, you fill in that self-esteem that deflates quickly.
- You constantly seek approval from others. In this way, you feel bad when you are not reinforced or recognized. That need for constant recognition is what defines and drives you.
- You try to attract the attention of the rest. You magnify or dramatize your explanations to get the attention of others. In addition, you can boast of possessions, knowledge, physical appearance, etc., and give your opinion when no one has asked.
- You are always aware of the impression that you are going to make on others. This makes you more attentive to that than to the situation itself.
These are just some of the signs we can identify when different types of ego dominate our minds and distort our reality. If you feel identified with some, the ideal is to find solutions that allow you to get out of this situation.
How to dominate the ego and let our true essence come out?
The ego develops in the form of protection. Normally we allow ourselves to be dominated by it because that way we feel more secure against attacks. The voice of the ego confuses us and takes us away from our true selves. It prevents you from feeling from the heart, from the simplicity of your emotions.
Stop focusing your gaze on the outside
It is important that you are able to see that all external acceptance needs are nothing more than illusions, fantasies that your ego has created for you. You don’t need any of that to be happy, all you need is to immerse yourself in simplicity and humility.
Do not pretend to be more, nor believe that you are less, because in the end we are all the same. Our inner essence is not that complicated. Try to eliminate from your life guilt, demands, perfectionism, the need to win or to be right, greed …
A life from simplicity
Choose to enjoy the little things, appreciate the beauty of life, indulge yourself with personal satisfactions. These can be fun practicing hobbies, personal care, cultivating true friendships, contact with nature, artistic expression …
Yoga to tame the ego
As they reveal to us from a study carried out by the University of Southampton, United Kingdom, the practice of yoga helps us to be more present, connected with our inner being in order to “slim down the ego” and take care of our own self-esteem . A healthy practice with great psychological and physical benefits backed by science. It’s worth a try.
In the end, we are realizing that the human being is neither as simple nor as complicated as we believe or are led to believe at first. If we put aside the thoughts, fears, external conditions that paralyze us and dehumanize us, we will discover our essence.
An essence in which we are simply complex beings, who only want to enjoy existence in good company. Let the love flow, accept yourself for who you are and shape a life less gruesome and tangled. Listen to that inner essence from the relaxation, we all have a great person inside who is very worthwhile, do not let the ego cloud you and bring out the worst in you.
