5 Ways To Manage Time After A Divorce

Managing time after a divorce is not easy. Being in a couple for years causes a routine to be established in which activities and habits are carried out that, after this experience, disappear. Thus, walks or movie nights are left behind, giving way to a series of free hours in which we do not know what to do.

This can be very hard. Especially if we have shared friendships with our partner that we have given up in some way or if we have become so focused on the other person that we have not had time to care for and maintain our own friendships. A situation that is very common, but that has a solution if we know how to manage time after a divorce.

1. Cultivate our self-esteem

As the article Perception of divorced women about divorce indicates , “it is common for the separation to produce dents in the self-esteem and identity of the people involved in it.” For this reason, it is necessary to learn to cultivate our self-esteem now that we have time to dedicate it to ourselves.

Signing up for workshops to learn to regulate and better manage our emotions, choosing readings that have to do with self-love, and appreciating all the positives we have in our lives can be of great help. In order not to forget the latter, we can have a notebook in which a list of reasons for which we feel grateful is reflected. In the saddest moments, turning to that notebook will allow us to take a new perspective of the situation.

2. Plan personal time

There is a fundamental activity that is about writing down, at the beginning of the week, everything we want to do. For example, attending the book fair, visiting a museum in our city where an exhibition about a specific painter is going to be held, taking a walk in nature, going to the gym for at least one hour every day, etc.

By planning personal time with these types of activities, we will not feel so alone or without idle hours to think about and regret the situation we have experienced. In addition, it is important to spend time with ourselves, whether it is taking a walk, going for a run or going to the movies alone. A divorce is an excellent opportunity to embrace our loneliness again.

3. Make our dreams come true

When it comes to time management after a divorce, we can consider dusting those old dreams that still survive in our drawer of wishes. Take a trip, take a vacation, sign up for a course or meet a specific goal (start a business, write a book, learn to sing, etc.).

Now, after our separation, we have plenty of time and zero excuses to get going and do everything that was just an idea with the possibility of being fulfilled in the future (something that never happened. Adopting this attitude will help us improve our self-esteem and to enjoy our own company.

4. Regain friendships

Recovering those friendships that we have put aside because we have focused so much on our relationship with our partner can be a good way to “repopulate” our circle of social support. However, we need to be aware that our friends can be reticent or upset because, at the time, our attitude hurt them.

In addition, the people who were part of our circle of friends have been able to go to other countries or have filled their time with other occupations, filling precisely the space that we have left. For this reason, this is an interesting point because it is the starting point for the next one we want to raise.

5. Meet new people

The last strategy or objective that we are going to present to you to manage time after a divorce has to do with expanding our social circle with new people. Although it is important to connect with old friends, possibly many have a partner or even children who limit them when it comes to making plans. Therefore, meeting people who may find themselves in a similar situation can give us that mattress of understanding that we do not find in our environment.

Joining groups and participating in workshops will increase the possibility of  creating links. They will cushion that feeling of emptiness that always remains when an element that occupies a large space in our lives leaves. They will not do the rebuilding work for us that we have no choice but to undertake, but they can be a valuable help on this journey.

Managing time after a divorce is possible if we cultivate our personal time as well as our social time. It is convenient that between these “two forces” we find a balance, making a distribution of spaces for solitude and company that does us good.